My findings, Sex & Blood.

My findings, Sex & Blood. 
Males will never fathom her complexities.
Let’s accept that. 

 

I write to share my thoughts now at 23 years of age, after several years of transformation. A growing consciousness it seems, sprouted by the practice of Yoga & meditation, trauma too. I was conditioned growing up by the males around me. Toxic masculinity and the mentality of objectifying the female body. A life confined to this mindset sings for change.

 

My findings…

 

I’ve learnt that to be ‘let in’ by a women is an honour. Entering her space, her body, her land should be done with intention and respect. The vagina is sensitive and sacred. She is the birthplace of human life. She is the gateway to existence, in which we’ve all come through. We’ve all slid through her slimy and expansive walls as new borns into our first breath. Let’s give gratitude.

 

I believe all humans have a duty to respect the female body, she is to be worshipped. We have been conditioned to sexualise her sacred land. I’ve experienced this myself and am grateful to have had broken free from ‘the pack’ of boys at a younger age than most, around 19. When you’re in it, you’re smothered by it, how could we know any better?

 

Something in me knew this patriarchal behaviour wasn’t right. It was animalistic. Though, I had to go through it. I had to objectify women, sexualise their bodies, treat them poorly and purge my own bottled up trauma into them to learn, and to question my actions and the actions of many other males.

 

I think we as collective of men, need to soften a little. We need to balance the seesaw of masculine and feminine energy. We need to befriend the feminine in us. Accept her. She’s there behind the external facade we’re too proud to show, waiting patiently to be heard. She’s knocking. Let her dance. Abiding by the childish and toxic terms like, ‘man up’ or ‘don’t be a pussy’, is a cry for change. Speak your truth. We need to open up and be more expressive. Yes, be strong and ply, though soft and gentle too. We need to come together with women, and share our indifferences and similarities. We need to understand each other. Though, in order to do this we need to understand ourselves. 

 

Sex…

 

Sex is an energy exchange. We should enter her to express love and love only. The vagina is not an outlet to release our bottled up emotion, our stress or anger. This is our own problem to deal with. Sit and breath, learn to meditate, get in the ocean, go tread the earth bare foot. The vagina is absorbent. Let it soak up love, passion and devotion. Let it soak up truth and honesty. Be present with her. Appreciate her appearance, her odour, her taste, her texture and all of her offerings. She is powerful and vast. She is an entrance to creation. Males will never fathom her complexities. Let’s accept that. She is mysteriously magnificent. Surrender to the feminine, she knows the way…

 

 

Blood…

 

Women bleeding has been perceived as being dirty. This is ignorance and disconnection. What is more natural than menstruation? The female body releasing her work, her constant preparation to give life. Her blood is liquid flesh. It’s nutrient rich and potent. Why is it wasted? Why is it disrespected and discarded? The scent of a bleeding female calls for nurture and attention. This is her time. We should respect this. Women are ever-changing. Expect less from her during menstruation, observe her changes. Watch her transition through her phases like the moon. Give her nurture, love and most importantly space. In tribal culture, this time was when a woman’s connection to spirit was most potent. They were sought after for advice. It was a time to tune in, to listen, to connect back to the soil, to the earth in which she and all of us came from.

 

Women are beautiful. Women are the creators. Women are the mothers. Women are the birthers, the life givers. Respect her. She is the land, she is the soil, she is the seed to existence. May spirit run through her veins… 

 

 

Words & photography: Cade McConnell

model: Samantha Neal

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8 comments

  • Thank you for articulating God’s view of women. Stay Blessed and please continue spreading the message.

    Gugu
  • Hello! I’m grateful to read these words, which comfort me and make me nourish the hope of the early arrival of collective awakening. And, although I completely agree with them, I would like to add a nuance.

    (Under my point of view) This wonderful capability that has been granted to woman (without asking her) is not what makes us worthy of a deep respect and attention, but the simple fact that we are a living being, like males are, like other animals are, like trees are. So, yes, I understand these words and I agree and I love them, but we must love and respect people not because of their capabilities, but because we are all different expressions of existence, all with their needs, cycles, functions and, yes, capacities to offer. Of course, the woman’s body is sacred, as the man’s too, both essential to create life, but if we justify the respect to women only with the argument of “life creators” we will continue to objectify the female body, after all, as a tool, as a channel towards something and not the women-person as an end in itself.

    (And even so, I would like to be respected not because this gift, which I didn’t choose to have, but because what i can consciously and intentionally do)

    In nature, we are all simple and wonderful tools, our value is determined by our ability to contribute to existence, by our ability to ensure that the wheel of life keeps turning. But nature is not soft and gentle, it is wild. In this society that we have built, we can not stay there. There are women who can not have children, women who do not want to have children. They still being sacred.

    We all deserve respect for the simple fact of being.
    Thank you very much for your precious and sincere words, Cade. This is just something I thought would be interesting to share.

    Love,
    Anxela.

    Anxela
  • I work in Zimbabwe providing women and girls with safe sanitary wear. It was such a joy to read your words and I love the photo. We are about to launch our range of period underwear as there is so much taboo around virginity and menstrual blood and what you can or can’t use. We are also wanting to work in the UK as it has become more and more evident that even though we pretend to be very casual about periods, most of us, women and men, are not up for a dinner party conversation about it or able to confidently pull a tampon from our bag when out in public, to take to the bathroom. It would be lovely to keep listening to you and I hope you will continue to educate and inspire men and women to feel comfortable and accepting of this most natural process. Thank you to my beautiful niece, Eliza for sharing this. xx

    Sarah Fox
  • What a beautiful and switched on young man you are!!! I do pray your msg reaches many young men and women to honour the divine masculine and divine feminine energies contained within all humans.

    Jem
  • Thank you for writing this piece. My partner read it too. A timely and valuable message to all.

    Pip

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